Chibi love
by RogueWarrior869
Summary: These are various chibi Dei one shots that could not be turned into actual stories. None will contain Character death. Only out of characterness. A short one where a certain Akatsuki member has doubts about his decision. Humor piece.
1. You're like my bear, un

Document Opened: 05/03/2009, 08:59pm.

Authors Note:

I'm having to re-write this the original is gone. Seriously, all of my previous works did not save during a transfer and I'm having to re-write everything.

Anyway, these are little chibi-Dei pieces that could not go into full stories.

They vary in time-line, genre and length.

Warnings will be in each chapter.:3.

This one for example.

An AU version of their time. And hopefully humor.

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The four year old was still sitting where he was since nearly two hours ago. He wanted to go and do _something _else but he did not wish to anger his baby-sitter and was doing as he was told. Sitting down and being quiet while the man, Kakuzu, counted his latest bounty money. So he sat there and at the moment was moving his beloved bears arms up and down almost hypnotically.

While he was fiddling with his bear he was reminded of Sasori-Danna. Not long after he had been brought to this place Sasori had offered to get him a new one but he refused. He didn't care how many stiches were visible all over the bear. People could get stitched back together and so could his bear.

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A few minutes later Kakuzu was done and was mildly impressed at how quiet the kid had actually been. It was hittiing on six thirty pm and he knew the boy must be getting hungry by now. And one of the last things he wanted was to incur the wrath of mother-hen Sasori.

He glanced down and the boy was still messing around with his old bear. "Hey, kid. Let's go get dinner." The child looked up at him and nodded. Kakuzu opted for leaving his head-piece behind for the moment and proceeded to take it off.

After doing so he looked back at the bo who was looking at him with a big pale blue eye. "What?" The boy was still silent as he looked back and forth between his bear the tall nin. The child looked like he had discovered one of the secrets of the universe and after a moment he smiled brightly at the money loving ninja before he got up and walked the couple of feet over and hugged the mans leg tightly and met his confused gaze. "You're like my bear, un."

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Authors Note:

I think the original was a little longer.

Yeah, this one does a sequel but thats not until later.

I'm only putting this once and here goes.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Masashi Kishimoto does.

There, done. I'm off to go post this and make dinner.

Finished: 05/03/2009, 09:42pm.


	2. Devices

Document Opened: 05/03/2009, 06:07pm.

Authors Note:

Anyone else remember candy cigarettes? And snorting pixie stix is candy drug joke I have seen around multiple forums.

Modern Day AU, Humor, that should be about it.

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The red head sighed in frustraion, relieved to be home at least. It was a little after three on a Friday and he had been sent home a little earlier then normal with a project due back on Monday.

He walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge. Making sure everything was still as he arranged it. Nothing had been moved so that was good at least. He was by no means a heavy drinker or smoker but today was one of those days were he wanted to light one up, drink on a beer and curse his boss, Pein, inwardly until he felt somewhat better.

Grabbing a beer from the fridge he then got a package of smokes from the top of cabinet, he had put the things up high ever since he _adopted_. If anyone would have told him two years ago that he would have been a parent to an blond haired, wannabe artist who was fascinated by anything that flew and explosions and with three extra mouths and a speech impedimant...well then he would have killed them and turned them into a puppet.

Speaking of the brat, he should be home anytime now: It was almost three thirty in the afternoon. He had left the front door unlocked. No sooner had he thought it then the door opened and he heard something drop beside the door and the door itself was slammed shut.

Sasori frowned at that since he had told him multple times already that not only was it rude to do that but he could also break some part of the door. He was seriously reconsidering letting Kakuzu lecture the kid on money and the fact it costs money to repair things.

The red head was waiting on the little ball of energy to come bursting in so he could give him a brief lecture himself about _not_ slamming doors but when the boy finally walked in he looked like how Sasori felt. "_Deidara_.." He was cut off by the child holding up his right hand and sighing,

"I don't wanna hear it, un." He said while going to the fridge and getting a couple of things. "You would not believe the day I had, un." He got his sought after items and sat beside Sasori at the table.

Sasori however raised an eyebrow at the items in question. The boy had gotten a bottle of root beer and his own pack of candy cigarettes. He hadn't remembered buying those for the kid.

He was not about to let him off the hook but for the sake of curiosity he would hear the boy out. "I doubt your day was worse then mine kid."

"Don't get me started. First Iruka-Sensei says I can't make my art 'cause it might hurt someone. Then at naptime I was _not_ even tired and I over heard him and Mrs. Tsunade talking and he thinks I can skip kindergarten next year and move on to first grade, un." He stopped to catch a breath before continuing. "I'm _five_. I don't need that kind of pressure, un." It was silent for a moment as the boy took a quick gulp of his soda and stuck one of the candy sticks in his mouth.

"Well after hearing that it puts all of my problems into perspective." Still, he knew he would be talking to someone at the school soon. What was troubling him at the moment was the fact the blond was obviously emulating him. And it was a rare thing for him to even have this out now. "Brat, how long have you been doing that?" He pointed to the root beer bottle and the white candy sticks. Effectively changing the subject.

His visible blue eye blinked and he appeared thoughtful for a few seconds before shrugging. "I don't know. It's just something I started doing, un." He took a moment to tilt his head at his dad who looked thoughtful for a moment himself.

It didn't last long however since soon enough Sasori ruffled his sons hair and stood up. "What was that for, un?" He huffed but didn't protest when he was picked up from his chair.

"Lets say we both had bad days and go get a pizza?" His response was a delighted "Yeah, un!" While they were leaving he knew he would have to them both new devices soon since one of the last things he wanted to come in and see was his son snorting a pixie stick or shooting up corn syrup.

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Authors Note:

Corn syrup is in just about every soda. Save for lemon/lime drinks. I don't think it's in there.

I only caim originality for their devices, the rest reall is not original at all. In fact "I'm _five. _I don't need that kind of pressure, un." line is parodied from some show I _cannot _remember.

And Tsunade is married to Jiraiya here hence the Mrs.

While writing this I saw the new 'Red Bull' commercial. It's horrible and inapproprite, the oy has to be like ten in the commercial. Shame, shame. I remember when they had funny ones and not bad ones like that.

And I opted for using dad instead of Danna since this is an AU thing and I figured Danna would not have worked as well.

And he does love Dei but Sasori had a bad day too so he's a little on the cranky side.:p.

Later.

Finished: 05/03/2009, 08:54pm.


	3. Storm

Document Opened: 05/13/2009, 05:37am.

Authors Note: This is an AU version of the normal time-line. Genre(s): Hurt/Comfort, fluff, hopefully a little splash of humor. ///////////\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\/////////////////\\\\\\\\\\\\\\//\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\/////////////

Another round of thunder made the small form shake and huddle closer to his Danna, who for the life of him could not understand why the boy seemed to _hate _thunderstorms when he based his art around explosions.

"Brat, why do you hate this kind of weather so much when your explosions make the same noise." He refrained from using the word racket. All the while he had put his free right hand on the boys head. His other hand was currently holding a book and he glanced away from it and down to the child he brought back to the Akatsuki barely a year ago.

"It's different then my 'splosions, un." He said quietly while making sure he was as close to his Danna as possible. Both of his small arms were wrapped around the older puppet artist and he was half sitting, half laying against Sasori. The puppet masters hand on his head did make him feel a little better though. But it was way after nine at night, close enough to ten and like the child he was, he fought sleep despite how tired he felt.

He simply did not like sleeping in this weather. So whenever his eyes started to fall shut another round of thunder would help him shoot back awake for a little longer. "How exactly is it different?" To him they were the same. Bright, loud and sometimes annoying. Granted he did understand that the young Iwa nin was very powerful but the thought of something like explosions being art was not something he was pleased with.

"I make my 'splosions with my creations and it's different, un." He wasn't quite sure _how_ to explain it. And partly he was too tired to put much more thought into it.

"Is it because you can control your creations and therefore control your explosions?" A small smile of amusement showed itself on his face as the boys visible blue eye was almost all the way shut. Of course another burst of thunder came and startled the boy back somewhat awake. "No, that's silly Danna, un." He sleepily muttered out barely remembering Sasori's question before he almost dozed off.

The red head in question rolled his eyes at the answer he was given. He decided it was best to change the subject. "You know it was a night like this when I found you and another like this when we arrived back." He had a lot of explaining to do to Pein regarding the child. It was just a big help that he was as strong as he was with his explosions.

"I 'member, un." A habit of the childs, when he was tired he tended to cut some of his words down when speaking. "Dad made me go away since he couldn't take how I looked, un." The thought made him sad. "Then I thought you were gonna kill me, un." Back then the stormy night had the skies pitch black and the only illumination was that of the lightning.

He was four at the time and the only thing he could see clearly on his Danna that night was his earthen eyes. Of course he had been wandering around for a little while prior to that and had been drenched and nearly freezing from the pouring rain. The fear that he felt combined with how cold he was overwhelmed his young body and he blacked out.

After that one thing led to another now he was here. "Are you happy here, brat?" He had known by fact that the everyone else took to the kid in less then a month after he brought him there, even himself since he unintentionally had taken up the role of a parent so to speak.

"Of course, un!" He looked up at his Danna. "When I first came here Konan gave me cookies and Hidan is teaching me some new words and 'Kuzu said next week he'd show me the life lesson of the value of a ryo, un." He took a moment to get some air and then continued. "'Tachi said I was getting better at stealth and Kisame's gonna show me a trick he can do where water comes out of his mouth, un."

Sasori was listening but what caught his attention was _HIdan _teaching him words. That couldn't be good if it was what he was thinking. "Zetsu's showing me all kinds of plants and Tobi...well he's just crazy, un." Then again the masked ninja _did_ come up with some rather interesting games. "Even Pein said in a couple of years I might be able to start some simple missions, un." He seemed rather proud of this since he did not want to be a useless burden to them and especially Sasori.

"You do realize that it thundered at least three times while you were talking right?" The child seemed almost surprised by this. "I didn't notice it, un." But for some reason he felt a little bit better though.

It was a couple of minutes of after ten. "Look, there's nothing to be afraid of. You should know by now that if _anyone_ or _anything_ tried to hurt you I would kill it with a slow and painful death." He meant it. He also happened to know that the others would do the same thing.

"Thank you Danna, un." He said sleepily. Even with the weather going on outside he knew he would probably be sleeping soon but continued to fight it. Sasori wrapped his right arm around the small form. "Go to sleep, brat." He spoke in calm tone but: it was clear that it was more or less a command.

Soon enough his eyes closed. "Love you 'Sori, un." He mumbled out before his breathing evened out and he _finally _fell asleep. "You too Deidara." He said quietly before returning to his book, the storm still raging on outside. ///////\\\\//////\\\\\////////\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\///////////\\\\\\\\\\///////\\\\\\\//////////\\\\\

Authors Note: Yep. Here's another one for the collection. Somehow backstory slipped it's way in there.o_o. Don't ask. Later people.:3.

Finished: 05/14/2009, 12:05am.


	4. Decisions, decisions

Document Opened: 05/15/2009, 06:43am.

Authors Note: I have wanted to write this one for a few days now but since it's so short I'm posting it along with a longer piece.

Genere: Humor.  
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"Maybe I should have waited." The figure looked thoughtful. "There could be Anbu, other enemy ninja. Traps." The figure shook it's head. "And how long has it been already? I should have waited. He's too young for missions."

Another figure in the room stepped more into the light. "Pein, he's ten and you only sent him to the store for milk, with Zetsu trailing him just in case. And that was ten minutes ago." She had known he had become attached to the child like the rest of them had but this was ridiculous.  
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Authors Note: I totally murdered Pein's character here but the idea was too good to pass up. I _did _say that these would vary in length.

Finished: 05/15/2009, 06:51am.

11/19/2009, 03:22am.  
All goes well, I should more chibi fic updates ready to be uploaded by tonight. Maybe sooner.:3.  
It's the only reason I'm posting this now.


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